It is indeed true that you get to have a wedding only once in a lifetime. Well, most people put a lot of thought into their marriage, the partner they choose, and their own life. So, there will probably be just one wedding and you will want to splurge on yourself and your guests. However, one must not forget that what follows is the more important thing, the marriage.
Why even consider?
Going minimalistic is in whether you are looking for cheap banquet halls or a much sensible décor. And you don’t have to have a small wedding just because it is in but because it could really help you. People who have an average sized wedding don’t necessarily end up in a rut called marriage. In fact, people plan a grand wedding mostly to impress other people. Maybe you want a grand wedding just for yourself, but admit it, the social impression does play a role in shaping your wishes around the wedding day. So, if you think there is a chance you don’t really want a huge wedding, consider a humbler one.
Just how small?
Now, the aim isn’t to win a Guinness World Record for the most miserly wedding. The aim is to make the wedding just as big as you truly want it to be. You only want to avoid falling for the peer pressure or societal pressures that compel you to have a grand wedding. So, do everything you want, and nothing you feel bullied into by a phantom force in your head.
The aspects
When it comes to a wedding, the budget is not the only consideration. There could be a lot of things that could be big or small or too average or JUST right. A lot of it does translate into money in direct correlation, but that isn’t the point.
You might have all the wealth in the world but it is important to know where to invest it. The aspects necessary to consider planning a wedding on a small budget:
- Guest list: You don’t want to invite people who are unimportant to you or who have been nasty to you just because “log kya sochenge”. It is your day. You make sure you are surrounded by only well wishers.
- Cuisine: Multi-cuisine is always a good option because the food habits of Indian people are radically diversifying. What is more important is to keep vegetarian or vegan options open as well. But there is just no need to go overboard with the options. Each guest only has one tummy to fill. And even if you can afford to arrange for 10 different cuisines for the invitees, a lot of food will be wasted and that is so not what the world can afford.
- Events: Of course the customary mehendi, DJ, and some fun events will be there. Make sure the wedding reception is fun. But the more elaborate plans you have, the more will be the number of details to take care of. Even if you have the best professional wedding planners hired, admit it, you will be anxious throughout one of the most important days in your life, thinking of every scenario that could go wrong. So, keep it simple and keep your peace.
- Avoid the one upping: Unfortunately most Indian weddings have two separate days for the wedding and reception where even if you don’t want it, the guests and even close relatives end up comparing the performance of the bride’s side with the performance of the groom’s side. It is tragic that a lifelong partnership should be marked by events where the partners are compelled to enter a competition that they, well… literally did sign up for. But one upping was never the intention. So, let both families take it light and spend more time bonding than in putting up a show. It’s not the Hunger Games!
- Jewelry and makeup: Gold is still quite the status symbol in India. And the less spoken about diamonds the better. De Beers played its masterstroke and it is still paying off. Of course, once again, put on all the jewelry you want to. But don’t overdo it. Not just because a lot of jewelry is too expensive, but because you don’t want to marry Bappi Lahiri, neither will your partner. Go for some custom jewelry to match your makeup and outfit so that it looks good, feels comfortable, and doesn’t cost you your lavish honeymoon. Keep the makeup minimalistic at a summer or monsoon wedding and don’t go bonkers in winter either. Less is more.
Benefits of a small wedding
You have already started to see the beauty of a small wedding. Maybe you are the one who has always been a believer in subtle and classy but need to convince your family. So, here is a comprehensive list of all the reasons why a small wedding is good for anybody:
- Expenditures: Of course, this needs no explanation. Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should spend a fortune on a wedding. If your wedding budget is making things difficult for you, make a practical budget. Focus on the marriage that follows.
- Quit that people-pleasing attitude: You need to learn to not give a fork to “log kya kahenge”. Do your best, give just as much as you want, but don’t do anything out of compulsion or societal pressure. Take your wedding day as the day you start doing this right thing if it has been difficult for you so far.
- Peace of mind: You deserve to relax on your wedding day. Gone are the days when weddings used to be elaborate like the princess of all occasions. It used to be a different time. People had more than 3 siblings and all their friends to take care of everything. Nowadays it’s just you with a few cousins and friends. So act accordingly. Don’t bite off more than you can chew.
- Partnership: The marriage is the core reason for the wedding. There is no point arguing about every little detail of the wedding and reception with your partner. You know somewhere deep down, you both want to have a pleasant day together. Keep it simple.
- Convenience: Overall convenience is achieved if the wedding isn’t elaborate. Any decent venue will suffice, the arrangements will be all smooth, and the day will be pleasant if there aren’t way too many things too handle.
- Be in the present: A small wedding allows your mind to be free enough to actually be present at your wedding. If you notice, a lot of wedding stories and the funny bits escape the minds of the bride and the groom when relatives and friends narrate them years later. It is because of the innate stress they go through the entire day. You don’t want to be that bride or groom who doesn’t get to be present in the celebration of your own wedding because you are too busy trying to make things grand, do you?
So, you now know why a simple and small wedding can be so beneficial for you. Keep it simple, and go for a lavish honeymoon, or buy that SUV you both always wanted to. Just have a happy marriage because that is all that really matters at the end of the day. A smooth successful wedding is just the cherry on the top of a perfect cake.
